Recovery From Food Fuckery

The two pounds I gained is gone. Good job, dumbass. I didn’t get a Lap Band to gain weight. *rolling my eyes* Protein shakes in the morning and actually watching my food, not indulging so much in the sliders (need to cut those little bastards OUT) works. Duh!

Yeah. As if I didn’t know that.

GM. Tsk. Tsk. Tsk. Shame on you is all I can say. You are in trouble and this is going to cost you BIG. And if you ask the taxpayers to bail you out when the shit hits the fan, nope. Tough titty, this time around, Fuck off and die. You got your second chance. You are blowing it. We shouldn’t have to pull you out of the quicksand, if you fall in, again. Fix your own shit, idiots.

Coffee is life.

Okay, enough of the chilly and windy. Balmy and breezy? Great. Chilly and windy? What the fuck?

Happy April. I don’t play April Fool’s jokes. I still don’t understand or appreciate them.

I also don’t understand or appreciate a world in which a homeless, single mother is forced to make the terrible choice to leave her two tiny children unsupervised in a hot car to go in for an interview for a desperately needed job because she had no one to look after her kids and is arrested and jailed. I don’t condone leaving tiny humans alone in a car in mid eighties weather to go for a job interview but I also believe strongly that there has to be a better way to intervene than to simply arrest and jail a mother in that awful, no win situation.

A local woman, moved by her plight has started a find raising campaign and has raised a nice amount of money ho help the homeless mom and her kids. This is a beautiful and heartwarming gesture. I hope that between the funds and hopefully the job she will soon find, the mom will get back on her feet and she and her kids will never find themselves in such a sticky situation. My heart goes out to her and to the thousands and thousands of single and often homeless parents who have to make difficult and often less than optimal decisions just to get through the day. They are often pushed to do things that they otherwise wouldn’t, just to survive.

And to the self righteous assholes who left mean and judgmental comments on the fundraising site, stating that she is nothing but a low life law breaker and doesn’t deserve to be rewarded for doing illegal things and putting her kids at risk, fuck you. Until you have to live her life, walk in her shoes, make her hard choices, FUCK YOU! 

I need another cup of coffee and to throat punch some holier then thou assholes.

Sliders, the Bane of My Existence

Fucking sliders, anyway.

Chips. Nits and ice cream. Go down so easily, slide right past my band without triggering it, (thus the name, “slider”) and fuck me up. I am holding steady. At least I’m not gaining weight but still… Eating like an asshole is not why I went under the knife. So, I am working on getting my idiotic slider habit under control and behaving myself, again. 

Pffft! You assholes who think that WLS is the easy way out. I’d like you to be in my fucked up head, facing ice cream and a perfectly balanced Lap Band. The ice cream can and will win. WLS can only do so much, I still have to do the work. I still have to stay out of the freezer, I still have to not eat the ice cream. 

It is cold, the wind is blowing. Why? It is colder, today than it was in January. We never did really get a Winter, by the way. Not that I am complaining, especially seeing that people in some parts of the country are still getting snow? Yeah, I am not bitching about the lack of a Winter, here. But we usually get cold, some snow and rain but this year, nope. But it is chilly and windy, today. Supposed to warm on up, tomorrow and into next week. 

I am scheduled for an aftercare appointment on the seventh. Yay! A trip to the Valley! I get to get out of Prescott, the armpit hell of Arizona. I seriously hate it here. If my husband could find a job elsewhere, we would so be out of here in a heartbeat. But, in this economy, this job market, a steady job, with good benefits is nothing to just set aside thoughtlessly so here we stay and at his job my husband remains. I’d love to live in the Phoenix area or another big city. Smaller town life sucks ass. I hate small towns. Rural living is for the birds. I was born to live in the city and I would love to get back there, one day. 

I bought press packs and pans. I have silicone and alcohol. I still need to buy Z-Palettes. My loose mineral eye shadows and blushes are about to get pressed. I am over the little jars of dust. They were fun and wonderful for a long time but I am done. I am not using them in their present form. They are sitting, unused, unloved and that is a shame because they are gorgeous and they cost me a lot of money, back when I bought them. I figure that pressed and in palettes, they will be easier to get to and use and I will actually reach for them and dip my brushes into them and apply them to my face, more often. 

Those people with that damned tobacco survey won’t stahp! I guess that my husband is going to go ahead and participate. Persistent. Pushy. They must get paid by the survey. 😛

 

Mornings Are for Gushy Food

As soon as I open my eyes, my cat is aware of that fact, knows that I have regained consciousness and has decided that, since it’s been a few minutes since he last snacked on the crunchies always available in his food dish he is starving to death and he needs his gushy food. NOW!!!! Poor baby. Starving too death. Bad, bad, evil Mama, makes him wait while she takes her morning stuffs, gets her coffee on and runs in to pee. Oh! the horror of it! The whole time, he is running back and forth, dogging my steps, rubbing on my legs, kissing ass, purring and meowing at a volume that would convince anyone that that he hadn’t been fed in a week. Then the moment the little turd gets the good stuff, that’s it. He doesn’t want to know. He is done until he wants something else. Typical cat.

How the fuck does a jumbo jet just “disappear?” In this day and age, with the technology we have available, satellites, radar, cell phones… All of the nattering about everything they have tried I haven’t heard anything about trying to contact or ping the cell phones of the passengers on board. Surely they have tried???? Please, tell me that I am not the only person that has thought of this? I’m sure I’m not. Still… A triple seven doesn’t just “disappear.” There is no pinging from the black boxes? No contact from the passengers, if the plane was landed, somewhere… Anywhere? Nope. Where is that plane? Did it crash? Is it deep in the ocean? Deep in a jungle? Did it land in a remote country and the people on board are being held, somewhere? It’s crazy and weird.

Had my hair done the other day. My roots were out of control! They get that way. Yeah, my hair is having a chemical romance with peroxide and dye. I had a few more layers cut around my face, too. I recently (just a few weeks ago) had my long hair cut to just below my shoulders. The shedding from my surgery in November, the resulting weight loss is fucking insane. I am losing hair in hanks.

When I was in prep for my surgery my hair was almost long enough for me to sit on. I knew that post surgery my hair was going to take a huge hit, shed like a sonofabitch and it was going to be rough so I started the dealing with it process by first doing a long psych myself up for it, then I had my stylist cut my hair to just above my bra strap. That was last September. It was still long, by most peoples standards, tho it felt pretty short to me, who was in to wearing her hair long. I let it grow from there and it was just about to my waist but it was shedding so terribly that the hair balls, especially on wash days, were the size of shower pouffs. Dealing with the huge shedding and the long hair was too depressing. As sad as I was to cut off my long hair, I couldn’t hack (if you will pardon the pun) the huge hairballs any longer. They were fucking bumming me out!

I accepted the fact that for the immediate future, anyway, I m going to be a shorter haired girl. It’s okay. I knew, going in to this that the likelihood that this would happen was high and I have been preparing myself for it. I knew that as I lose weight, I would lose hair. I am going to lose more for a while. It’s a good thing I have really thick hair because if I didn’t, I’d be half bald, by now! No joke. I have some thinning along my hairline, at my crown… my overall volume is down dramatically. I still have some hair. For now… I know that it won’t all fall out. I just hope that it won’t thin to the point that vast areas of scalp become visible.

Look, I am not trashing on anyone who looses their hair to medical treatments, such as chemotherapy. I feel for them. My cousin is fighting breast cancer for the second time around and has lost all of her hair, again. She had such beautiful hair. The women in our family are genetically blessed that way… But for me, since that is not the case, I am allowing myself vain whining. And yes, it is in the face of awareness that others are suffering much worse and no I don’t need lectures that others are suffering much worse. I get the others who are suffering much worse. I lost my mother to cancer last November so yeah, save your self righteous bullshit for someone else. I don’t need it and I don’t want it.

Okay, Erika, dial it down.

I was late for my appointment, the other day. I have become one of those people… Run late. I used to be that annoying person who is always so prompt, checking her watch, worried she will be late, is early. Now, I think I have bags of time so I take my time, fritter around, doinkity-doink and next thing you know… I’m late. But hey,

Image

Am I right?

It’s nice to have fresh, bright roots. We talked about changing up my look a little with lowlights and deeper roots, then blowing my overall colour lighter, cooler, kind of a “bitch blonde” look. I was all about it but right now, with my shedding and thinning, I think that dark hair close to my scalp is a bad idea. I have a very light scalp and the contrast will only serve to emphasize the thinning even more. So, for now we are keeping my light all over look. She did my roots then mixed in some toner and pulled colour through to my ends, which she hadn’t done in a while and refreshed my hair all over and it looks good. I’ll do bitch blonde when the thinning stops and my thickness starts to recover.

I think I’ll link my Instagram to this blog, just for the fun of it. See how it works.

Let’s Get This Party Started!

The goal of this blog is two fold. First, to have a place to natter about life, my band and whatever. Second, I need to learn how to navigate the WordPress platform before I move my beauty blog over to self hosted WordPress from Blogger. Blogger has been great, but if I want to take my beauty blog to the next level, I have to take off the training wheels and make the move.

I have a lot to learn before that happens. This platform is freaking me out! It looks good, tho. Yikes!